Part 90: Shattered Dreams And Broken Lives

At the institute, I looked for Uta. I wanted to apologize to her for the embarrassing incident and, above all, to know how she was. But I did not find her. 

Obviously, she had gone home to her parents. There was no question that our separation had become inevitable, and I wanted to talk to her about that. But it didn’t come to that. What prompted my father to inform the party leadership of the then delegation factory immediately after discovering the liaison remains unresolved.

For the party secretary, the matter obviously seemed too important to tolerate any delay. He immediately informed the institute’s management. That same week, the incident was dealt with publicly.

The high tribunal was composed as follows: FDJ representatives from Uta’s and my seminar group, the party leaderships of the delegation factory and the institute, and the school management. My wife and my father acted as witnesses. My mother was invited, but she did not appear, and Uta’s parents.

The trial was held in public. Undoubtedly, the intention was to set an example to deter the entire student body. According to the SED, all people should live according to the principles of ‘socialist ethics and morals,’ but behind closed doors the people joked about ‘Edith and Moritz.’

The trial was intended to prove that the party did not tolerate violations of this dogma. It all boiled down to punishing the accused severely, especially the seducer. The procedure was reminiscent of a medieval witch trial. After the positive assessments of the accused by the seminar group leaders, the gloating did not stop.

Embarrassing questions were asked: Where, how often and how we would have done it? These questions remained unanswered. Although brought up atheistically, a Christian saying came to my mind during such embarrassingly intimate questions: ‘Let he who is free from sin cast the first stone.’

In the course of the trial, everything boiled down to exmatriculating Uta and sending her to production for probation. No one knew better than I what that meant for the girl with a high school diploma, half a degree, but no job. I wanted to prevent that at all costs.

I managed to convince the high tribunal that I alone had seduced the innocent girl. Uta was allowed to stay, for which the party punished me with a ‘severe reprimand,’ and the school administration had to exmatriculate me shortly before the end of my studies. The nerve-racking trial was only a farce.

Without any condition I was kicked out, although I had successfully studied seven semesters at state expense. The embarrassing questions and accusations during the trial destroyed even the last hope of reconciliation with my wife and family.

Contact with Uta also broke off. Crying helplessly, she and her parents left the hearing room, and we never met again. 𝓣𝓸 𝓑𝓮 𝓒𝓸𝓷𝓽𝓲𝓷𝓾𝓮𝓭

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